Sta.sh
*1*
行く年や机の上に本の山
yuku toshi ya tukue no ue ni hon no yama
the passing year-
a mountain of books on my desk.
*2*
粥の湯気めがねに白い世界かな
kayu no yuge megane ni shiroi sekai kana
steaming hot porridge-
through the glasses
a white world!
*3*
寄せ鍋の箸合戦を遊びけり
yosenabe no hashi gassen wo asobi keri
steamboat-
we spar with chopsticks.
*4*
夜通しに唄ういびきと隙間風
yodooshi ni utau ibiki to sukima kaze
singing through the night,
the wind through that window seam
and his snore.
*5*
残月やかみの白きにすみのあと
zangetu ya kami no shiroki ni sumi no ato
the remnant of moon-
traces of ink on pale white paper.
OR
the remnant of moon-
silver hair stranded behind a corner.
*6*
北風や夜空をのぞく室の花
kita kaze ya yozora wo nozoku muro no hana
the north wind-
an indoor blossom peeks
at the night sky.
*7*
北向きの頬の痺れやモンスーン
kitamuki no hoo no shibire ya monsuun
a numbness on the north-facing cheek-
monsoon wind.
*8*
東屋の廂に掛かる寒の月
azumaya no hisashi ni kakaru kan no tuki
poised on the eave of a gazebo-
the cold moon.
*9*
十四日がんがん響く獅子の舞
juuyokka gangan hibiku shishi no mai
on the fourteenth day,
the head-throbbing lion dance.
*10*
元宵の月の明かりや赤いばな
genshou no tuki no akari ya akai bana
oh how bright
is the first full moon
and my red nose!
*11*
片隅に秘かな園や塵光る
katasumi ni hisoka na sono ya chiri hikaru
'the secret garden' in a corner-
bright specks of dust.
*12*
夜の猫や倒れたみかんの金字塔
yo no neko ya taoreta mikan no kinjitou
nocturnal cats-
a razed pyramid
of tangerines.
*13*
月冴えたガラスに映るはげのつや
tuki saeta garasu ni uturu hage no tuya
a clear crystal moon-
the reflection of a lustrous bald head on the glass.
*14*
冬という季節は朝の二十二度
fuyu toiu kisetu wa asa no nijuuni do
we call this season 'winter':
22°C in the morning.
*15*
ふわふわと水梅の香や朝の凪
fuwa fuwa to suibai no ka ya asa no nagi
the weightless scent of wrightia drifts
in the morning calm.
*16*
のらくらや俳句代わりにおおかみを
norakura ya haiku kawari ni ookami wo
slacking,
instead of writing haiku
i draw wolves.
*17*
鼻水も涙も出せるラクサかな
hanamizu mo namida mo daseru rakusa kana
with snivels and tears,
oh laksa!
*18*
劇場や化粧崩れたお嬢さん
gekijou ya keshou kuzureta ojousan
drama theatre-
the lady's make-up is in a mess.
*19*
帰り時に重いまぶたやおぼろ月
kaeriji ni omoi mabuta ya oborotuki
going home with heavy eyelids-
a fuzzy moon.
*20*
虎猫のけんかの相手ぬいぐるみ
toraneko no kenka no aite nuigurumi
the tiger cat wrestles
with a stuff toy.
*21*
コーヒーを飲む八人や星の空
koohii wo nomu hachi nin ya hoshi no sora
eight souls sipping coffee,
a starry heaven.
*22*
片道や赤花を散るにわか雨
kata michi ya akabana wo chiru niwaka ame
one way street-
red flowers littered by a sudden rain.
*23*
黒猫の銀の輪郭光けり
kuroneko no gin no rinkaku hikarikeri
the black cat's silver silhouette
glows.
*24*
夕食や足にぐるぐる猫三匹
yuushoku ya ashi ni guruguru neko sanpiki
dinnertime-
three cats wheeling round and round my legs.
*25*
赤々と鼻の真中にニキビかな
aka aka to hana no manaka ni nikibi kana
right in the middle of her nose,
a fiery red pimple.
*26*
梅つ月ながめの空や空の日記
umetutuki nagame no sora ya kara no niki
the sky persistently rains
in the second lunar month-
a blank diary.
OR
the second lunar month,
i gaze at the distant sky-
a blank diary.
*27*
野良猫のピカピカの目や鳩の群れ
noraneko no pika pika no me ya hato no mure
the stray cat's sparkling eyes-
a herd of pigeons.
*28*
雨雲はあの尖塔を触りけり
amagumo wa ano sentou wo sawari keri
the rain clouds
graze against that spire.
*0*
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HOORAY
A beautiful read, perfect with a relaxing cup of tea
I like how despite there being no snow to speak of in Singapore, that you've managed to give a wintery feel in so many of these with kigo and other allusions. You mentioned that in your comments as an intention of the collection and you have succeded for sure.
If I was to be finickety, I'd say that some of these are screaming out for a second linebreak, particularly in the early part of the collection with 2, 5, 6 and 12. I also reckoned that some of the latter pieces, 17, 19, 21 and maybe 26, were lacking something extra to turn the image into something more.
The second was one of my favourites despite it 'missing' a linebreak. The white world of misted glasses is very familiar to me, and well depicted indeed. I also liked 24 and 28 very very much, the former because I love cats of course, and love the way you picked out that begging behaviour so well, and the latter because of the way you show the sharp spire digging into the rain clouds. They were just a select few of a very competant collection indeed though.
Well done once again on finishing. I will catch up I promise. :~)
i thought i did better my last haikuwrimo with summer as the theme.
i tend to write two-liners due to the influence of japanese kireji 'ya' and 'kana'. i section the verse according to the position of the kireji in the japanese originals. i will ponder over those verses you suggested for more line-breaks.
as for adding more to make the verse tell more, i guess i am under a great constraint of the japanese 17 onji. it can only tell so much with usually 4-6 words. i wish i could squeeze in more, but then it will become an essay according to haiku standard. in order to be truthful in translation, the english versions are just as brief.
i don't think i am capable of changing the verses in this aspect.
thank you for the critiques. they are most appreciated.
#22 the red flowers bring this alive.
#23 the image of the cat glows in the haiku as it does in the reality.
#24 I know the feeling. Do the cats ever trip you up?
#25 Is funny because we have all had one of those kinds of pimples.
#27 Watch out pigeons. The word sparkling suggests very well the cat's intentions.
#28 Graze is a great word in this one. A strong way to finish.
Hurray we did it!
!!hooray again for completion!!
i'll probably take another year to go through the offerings of other participants.